Have you ever noticed that there are certain areas of your life that consistently don't work? Do the same self-sabotaging behavior patterns and the same type of upsets keep showing up in your life?
These conditions keep showing up because we create them. This may sound like an odd thing to say, but as you read the articles on this site, you will discover that this is true.
|
Every one of us has an internal mechanism that forces us to act in a way that destroys love and sabotages our life. Once you discover this mechanism and learn how it works, you can remove it. Problem areas can clear up and you can create an incredible life.
How it works
When you were born, you were pure love, but you were born into a world that suppresses this state. You then got hurt. You experienced rejection, invalidation, and painful losses of love.
As a little child, the only way you could explain these painful losses of love was to blame yourself. "Clearly I'm the problem." In a moment of hurt, you decided that you were worthless, not good enough, not worth loving, a failure, or some other form of feeling "not okay."
 |
It wasn't the truth that you were this way, but in the eyes of a little child, it became your truth. You then took this a step further and fought the very belief that you created. "Worthless is a horrible way to be."
You fought the belief and you fought all the hurt that came with it. From that moment on, the primary, subconscious focus of your life would be to avoid this hurt. It's the automatic avoidance of this hurt that gets us in trouble.
|
Any circumstance that triggers this hurt is perceived subconsciously as a major threat to our survival. In an automatic attempt to avoid this threat, we fight, resist, hang on, and withdraw. We also create a state of tunnel vision. Since this hurt is so threatening, all our subconscious focus is on making people and life be a certain way so we don’t have to feel it.
It's the tunnel vision that sabotages our lives
This narrow focus sabotages us in two ways. First, it destroys our ability to find solutions and to see what works. The answer to a problem could be right beside us, but we won't be able to see it because the answer is outside the tunnel vision.
The tunnel vision also forces us to act destructively. Since we feel threatened, we have to either attack the threat or run from it. Subconsciously, our only alternative is to fight, resist, hang on, and withdraw. This destroys the experience of love and makes our situation worse.
If you have a relationship, or any other area of your life that isn't working, there will always be an underlying tunnel vision that is creating the problem. The problem may seem to be caused by your circumstances, but this is an illusion. The circumstances are not the problem. They are the symptom.
As long as you focus on the symptom without addressing the cause, nothing will change and the suffering will continue. If you want to resolve a problem area of your life, take the focus off of the circumstances and put your focus on finding and removing the underlying condition that keeps you from resolving the problem.
As you remove this condition, the tunnel vision loses power. You restore your ability to see clearly and can see what needs to be done. Solutions, opportunity and possibility can then show up
